Calamity Anne's Adventures: STOP...In The Name Of The Law

Sunday, February 06, 2011

STOP...In The Name Of The Law

It's the same thing every.single.day.of.the.year! I'm obviously NOT the boss around here.....and Logray is obviously NOT going to obey me. This battle continues during every meal that's eaten in this house.....and will continue for every meal from here on out. Logray.....is the cat.....Monster Boy.....the Bitch.....along with various other terms of endearment.

He's giving me the LOOK

Cats aren't allowed on counters.....right? They're not allowed on the table.....right? How come I can't get this rule into Logray's thick and stubborn head? How come he doesn't get the gist of things when I slide him off the table.....or physically put him on the floor? Why does he insist to play this power trip with me?

He can take those eyeballs off of my food

I've resorted to creating fences between the two of us.

In the morning it's usually a cereal box.....which he head-butts till it falls over. Then I grab the jug of milk to brace the cereal box against.....and he head-butts them inches closer to my food. For lunch I usually stand at the counter.....do you think I get relief from his begging.....no way José! Dinner is more of the same thing. If I veer my eye away from my food.....the little stinker stretches out a paw.....shoots his nails out.....and grabs whatever is closest to his greedy little mouth.....whether he plans on eating it or not! Now I've resorted to a new fence.....jars of honey. It's working! He dares not cross these sticky little fences.....for the time being. Do you think he has the brains to head to the other side of the table and do the same crap with the Big Boober? Hell no! Logray and the Big Boober have an unspoken understanding.....don't mess with the Boober!